Seduction mostly has a bad name. That bad rap was even continued by Garrison last week. Thursday was Rilke’s birthday, and to mark the occasion Garrison Keillor wrote about how Rilke traveled around Europe and seduced rich noblewomen. The way Garrison presented it, it was not a compliment. To me, Garrison protrayed his own misogyny and notion of male dominance over women. It was a distorted and narrow notion of seduction.
True, there are times when seduction is coupled with manipulation. Someone may seduce another in a way that involves deception or control. If someone has power over another, seduction can be manipulative. The power could be out of many things including wealth, station, custom or relationship. Sometimes seduction is related to deception when someone is not who they pretend to be. Unfortunately, there can be many corruptions of seduction.
For me, seduction can be a deep invitation to an intimacy that is freely offered and freely exchanged. Seduction is a free giving and a free response. There is no element of control or manipulation. Seduction into intimacy is a choice that invites a choice between free individuals.
I recognize this kind of seduction when I acknowledge that the beauty of a garden seduces me to enter into in and actively pleasure in its presence. I am invited by the forest to give my full presence to its velvety and inviting presence. The sound of music filling my home seduces me to yield to an open acceptance of its beauty and excitation. The snow falling outside my window seduces me to a deep appreciation and engagement with the mysterious wonders of winter.
When I pass someone in an open space, our eyes meet and the smiles we exchange convey a seductive acknowledgment that mutually affirms our presence. I know when I speak to someone, it is a seductive invitation to respond. If we choose, we can begin an exchange that is more than simple words. There can be times that we choose to feel the presence of one another. The seduction begins with exchanged words, but it can go deeper into a mutually felt presence. If we choose.
Perhaps I am simply revealing my acknowledgment that I am a seducer. As I go through my day, I routinely seduce many people around me. And I am often seduced by then as we enter into many pacts of intimacy. For me, seduction is a common experience as I am seduced by the world around me and people who willingly open to me.
I am aware that not everyone who has attempted to seduce me has been successful. I have many times chosen not to be seduced. Or I have set limits to the degree that I am willing to be seduced. It has been my choice, just as I freely offer that choice to anyone that I gesture a seductive invitation. While I know my chosen limits, I think that my default presence is to be seductive. I want to be intimate with the world, and I offer that invitation to join me in intimacy often and freely.
Sometimes, I think that the fear of genuine intimacy has caused seduction to acquire a bad name. An inability to be intimate has stirred fear in the closed hearts of many. The only kind of seduction they can imagine is one that is manipulative, absent of intimacy. I choose to see a kind of seduction that is freely given and invites a freely chosen presence. I offer an engagement that is without deceit and without control. I invite an experienced presence equal to mine.
Sadly, the way that Garrison protrayed Rilke’s seductions does not encourage a view of free exchanges. I think that Rilke had a lot to offer because I read his poetry. How much that entered into his seductive behavior I can only guess. It is enough for me is that I am seduced to enter into his world daily . And I guess that many others may have freely entered into that same world, each in their own chosen way.