For a long time, I’ve been puzzled by the social reluctance to believe those who disclose that they have suffered sexual abuse or violence. Admittedly, there are women who have falsely reported being harassed or violated. I have experienced this in my own life. But i doubt that is the norm, and I know many reportings are credible, many supported by witnesses. Yet there is a resistance in our society to acknowledge the abuse or violence.
I think sexual abuse and violence are part of the ambience of our culture. Fathers do abuse their daughters, men do force women into sex, husbands do assault their partners. It is all around us.
For a few years I have been studying the dynamics of racism in our culture. It is so much a part of our every-day ambience that we have become unaware that it is happening. The hidden violence and abuse of racism happens all the time. We are hardly even aware that we are participating in this culture of racism. We ignore and even deny that it is happening. We doubt the reporting by those who have experieced racial abuse or violence. We are unaware of our participation in this dynamic.
I think this same dynamic is at play in how our culture denies and ignores sexual abuse and violence. It is such an integral part of the patriarchal world that we no longer recognize or accept when it happens in front of us or is evident on the pages of the newspaper. It is such a part of the ambience of our culture that we have largely become unaware of its presence, like the air we breathe. We often deny its presence.
The reporting of the sordid details attributed to leaders in our county are just one example of our broad unwillingness to believe the victims. Officials are elected and appointed without regard for their role in sexual abuse and violence. Like racism, the dynamics of our culture are so infused with sexual abuse and violence that many feel compelled to ignore them. Like racism, to acknowledge that the ambience is so affected by sexual violation would require a radical remaking of our culture.
If we widely acknowledge the prevalent ambience of sexual violation, our whole patriarchal house of cards could tumble.
