Unspoken

I have spent so much energy and attention on learning how to speak clearly. It has especially been important to reveal what I was thinking. The emphasis has been to clearly share in words what I was feeling, thinking or intending. Speaking clearly and with meaning has been both my intention and my habitual effort. It seemed the right thing to do.

I now appreciate the value of keeping things unspoken. I see the place and importance of being silent. I am finding this is valuable in small groups and in one-to-one relationships. Knowing when to keep things unspoken, perhaps for only a while, is becoming very important to me. I am appreciating its value.

I actually have habitually been a good listener, and that is a trait I am even more aware of as I consider the value of words unspoken. I am learning the value of things left unspoken. Sometimes leaving things unspoken is not only enough, it is actually better that they remain unspoken. It is better sometimes for me to simply be present and attentive.

I feel like I appear to have come full circle. This decision to be silent, leave things unspoken may once have been my default, and that may be what seems to be the same. But now it is significantly different for me to leave things unspoken. A long time ago, I was simply unable to speak. I typically did not know how to express what I was thinking or felt. So thoughts and feelings went unspoken.

Now it is different, mostly because I am much more in control. I understand much better the workings of my inner life, and am able to speak more freely and clearly when I choose. My inner awareness is so much stronger, and I can choose whether or not to leave that awareness unspoken. I know that I can typically speak in a deep and revealing way, if it seems appropriate, and if I choose.

It is often not appropriate to speak, even though I know I can. I know I can choose to leave things unspoken, and that is sometimes the better way.

When I am not speaking, I am often much more present, more attentive to what others are speaking or doing. I am much more attentive to their words and their actions. My engagement with others is much more reciprocal when I resist or ignore the habitual urge to speak. There are times to leave some things unspoken, and simply be present.

I want to listen more and pay even better attention than I have. I want to develop the habit of critically examining the question of whether others might benefit from what I might say. Will they be better off if I speak, or will they be better off if I leave things unspoken. Will I be better off if I do not speak.

Even I may be better off if I leave some things unspoken, when I am more selective about when to speak or what to say. I want to be more attentive to the option I have of leaving things unspoken.

I intend to put more attention on being aware and being very present. I want to ignore the urge to speak, leaving many things unspoken.