I notice how so many men seem lost without a woman in the center of their life. I don’t think that this is exclusively true of men, but it seems much more common among men than women. I remember my own intense anxiety each time I became separated from a prominent woman in my life. I quietly wondered whether I could survive on my own. My confidence in myself was weak. Each time, as it turned out, I did just fine.
I experience a great cultural divide between men and woman. In spite of all the apparent male bravado around me, I mostly see my male friends dependent on a central woman in their life. The dependence may even extend to their being taken care of by a woman. However, it mostly has more to do with what I think is an acute dependence on feminine virtues and strengths present in women. The men don’t cultivate or rely on those aspects in themselves.
Exceptions to this pattern are those men who are more in touch with their own feminine aspects. These aspects are those parts related to the liberal arts. These exceptions are those men who have learned to rely on their own hearts for guidance and strength.
I find it interesting that I spent 17 years immersed in an all-male culture, and their lasting impact on the living part of me is minimal. The real and significant impact on my living self has predominantly been by women I have known outside that male environment. Each day I invite the presence of specific men and woman into my life, people I know now and have known in the past. The women out-number the men 5 to 1.
I am grateful for all the individuals, mostly women, who have been my teachers, guides and inspiration. I am especially grateful that so many of them have influenced my life without creating a lasting bound of dependence, even when I might have desired it.
I have grown up in a world that has encouraged me to rely on an emotional and spiritual dependence on women. I have resisted that pressure, and fortunately I have known a number of women who have not encouraged that kind of dependence.
I am grateful that I am very comfortable in an atmosphere of feminine virtues and strengths. It is a world that I both admire and constantly venture into. Above all, I am grateful that I am slowly uncovering, discovering and encouraging my own feminine side.