Vulnerable

So much depends on my willingness to be vulnerable.    I am gradually beginning to accept that I just might not be in charge.   Nor do I have to be in charge.    Yielding to ‘what is’ is one of my greatest arenas of vulnerability.    That includes yielding to what I am, what others are, and what is happening.

I am vulnerable because I want others to be able to see me just as I am.    There must be no pretense.   Things are not in my hands as I once thought they were.    I allow more things to happen without a great deal of planning.    I relax more and simply experience whatever happens.    I rely on my instincts and insight to know how to respond.

I am more prepared and able to accept what comes my way, whoever comes my way with the confidence that all I really need to do is be present.    I do not intend to try to change or resist what exists.    This feels incredibly vulnerable.

I try to see others just as they are and not as I might want them to be or imagine them to be.   There is little attempt to make them different to meet my expectations.    I simply expect them to be present and be themselves.    I have a willingness and vulnerability to fall in love at least once a day, again and again and again.   It gets quite easy once I drop my expectations, my defenses,  my cautions and become vulnerable.

Being vulnerable means I am willing to accept the consequences.    That reminds me that I do have my limits.   I am not always willing to accept all the consequences.     I’m not sure yet if this is still self protection or simply an aspect of wisdom and insight.    I know that I am still willing to put limits on my vulnerability .    Those limits, however, are diminishing.

Being vulnerable has meant becoming more aware and accepting of my shortcomings.     There are so many things I do not do well.    There is so much I do not yet understand.

But there is one thing that I do understand.    The more vulnerable I become the more intimate I am with myself and the world in which I live.    That is a very good thing.