I continue to be fascinated by the role that imagination plays in my world. For so long, I believed in a vision of my world that was dominated by the imagination of someone else or myself. It was a world I believed in, even though I had scant experience that it actually existed. I still have some of that fantasy aspect in how I see the world. It is not always helpful, and it obscures my attention to the reality around me.
It is hard for me to push aside all the images created by my beliefs. My beliefs color so many of my experiences and give shape to those experiences in ways that are not helpful. This is true of my continuing beliefs about the world of matter, god(s), or persons.
Belief is the product of fantasy and imagination. It has helped me to impose some sense and rationality on a world I barely understood. It has allowed me to maintain a temporary balance when I was awash with ambiguity and uncertainty. Belief has been a helpful working hypothesis, giving me some stability until such time as I am able to embrace the fundamental ambiguity of the real world.
Belief has been a temporary fix. Worse, it creates a fantasy world, a world of non-reality. It keeps me from entering the world of reality. Not at all comforting, it is a source of suffering because it separates me from the real world. When I am no longer distracted by my imagination, I am able to truly know whoever or whatever I experience. Only then is reality present. Only then does reality happen.
Coupling has been one of those illusory beliefs of my life. My coupling has created an imaginary structure or arrangement to make things the way I want them to be. Coupling has been based on some experienced reality, but has largely been a product of my imagination. It is a temporary structure that needs constant adjustment. It serves me until I am able to experience someone as they really are, without my imagination, how they relate to me without the imposed structure. Only that is real.
Coupling is an agreement drawn out of imagination, fantasy and desire to provide stability until such time as the real relationship can exist on its own. I think that coupling for me has usually been based on some realities, but it has primarily been made of aspiration, intention and imagination.
Even imagined coupling can for a time provide mutual support and refuge, much like that provided by reliance on an etherial, imagined, divine entity. My imagination can serve me well until such time as I am ready and able to experience reality as it truly is. Then it is time to let it go.