Walls

I’ve become convinced of the importance of maintaining walls.  There are times that a wall gets built without my awareness of its progress.  But once built, I want to recognize its presence, perhaps its importance.   I think that Brenda and I built a wall over many years, but now that same wall is a part of the landscape that we both respect.   It serves me well, and I  suspect her experience is similar.

A wall does not mean a lack of compassion.    In fact it allows for more respect.   In my case, the wall between Brenda and me recognizes that our lives are no longer co-mingled, except for our mutual interest in Nathan and Sorin.   Her side of the wall is a foreign country, another universe.   What happens on either side of the wall stays there.

I have no interest in what goes on beyond the wall, except perhaps for catastrophic events or matters that affect Nathan and Sorin.   I am relatively sure that the same is true of her.   Like me, she would rather not know.

The wall is an important feature of my secret garden.   Only select people are allowed to enter, and only by my choice.  The wall protects and contains.   It helps me focus on  the tasks I want to do.

For similar reasons, I build other walls.   For two months, I have walled myself off from news on the radio and newspaper.   I finally realized how illusory and misguiding the news had become, and I want to live separate from that news.   While I am interested in the true nature of events, I know that the representation of those events in the news is false.

The same its true of religions.   I have gradually come to see that religions show me a fantasy, a make-believe view of the world.   I shield myself  from the illusions of religion.   I prefer to become more mindful of the world as I experience it, illusory as that is.

Until they no longer serve their purpose, I think my walls must remain.