I never want to be so old that I no longer continue to unfold. I am in wonder at all the new possibilities that continue to present themselves. Unforeseen and unpredicted. There are even new physical improvements that I never dreamed possible.
Mostly I am awed by the possibilities of my inner space. As I discover new insights and mental skills, I can only wonder at what might lie ahead. I am discovering that I have many more human skills within me that I never knew about before. I am slowly learning to use my mind in new ways and manage myself in a strange new way.
I am concluding that humans have great adaptability built into their genetic code, but we only make use of a small part. There is so much there, but we limit ourselves by so many pre-conceived notions about what the world is about. We constantly miss the opportunity of discovery.
For so long I have tried to uncover the meaning and identify the pattern of things, and what I missed is the fundamental randomness and ambiguity of everything. There is no certain pattern and reality exists only in my encounter. There is no static world, all is evolving. Equally important, my awareness is evolving too.
Even this life-form we call human has constantly changed for 3.5 billion years, becoming something “not quite the same” with each passing moment. I am the result of a roll of the genetic dice. I am a little different in my make-up, my inner pattern from my ancestors who lived a hundred years ago. Even my consciousness is evolved. I can unfold possibilities not available to them.
The randomness of this continuous change is exciting. The stream of existence is constantly not the same and is unpredictable. I am sad that religion has misled me into thinking that I would find certainty if only I believed. I grasped for certainty when I needed to let go of certainty. All the while, I needed to embrace the uncertainty, randomness and ambiguity of all things.
So this new day presents itself to me. It is another opportunity to delve deeper, to unfold another layer, to discover another possibility.